Editorial: Please, folks, write your own letters to the editor...

“I’m gonna sit right down and write myself a letter – and make believe it came from you” – hit song by Billy Williams, 1957

Among the political games that take place every election season is one I like to call “Balderdash: Deluxe Letters to the Editor Version.”

It’s a lot like the classic Balderdash board game, in which players have to suss out the real definition of a word amid several phonies. Only in my version, I’m sent, say, three letters to the editor endorsing the candidacy of a local politician – and I’ve got to work out which one’s the genuine opinion of a community minded Sonoma resident from the two that were submitted by “friends” of the campaign.

Unfortunately, my Balderdash is far tougher than the board game, where all one has to know is the definition of words like “snollygoster” (A: an unprincipled, but shrewd person; a politician). Because in the letters-to-the-editor edition, you not only have to read the mind of the letter writer, but sometimes of the person who wrote it for them.

Case in point: Two weeks ago, Jon Foreman, president of the board of the Valley of the Moon Water District, sent the Index-Tribune and the Press Democrat a letter purportedly speaking on behalf of all five board members endorsing candidate Gina Cuclis in the 1st District Supervisor race. In the letter, Foreman says the board finds Cuclis’s opponent, incumbent Susan Gorin, “frustrating, disrespectful and dishonest.” Then adds: “We trust Gina won’t give us the runaround.”

That letter would seem to be a pretty harsh indictment of Gorin on behalf of the leaders of an influential Sonoma Valley agency – and it would be even harsher if Foreman had actually written the letter in the first place, and the other four board members were aware of its existence. Here’s what happened:

The Press Democrat ran the letter May 2 (the I-T didn’t run it, though it did remain in the letters queue for upcoming publication). Then on May 9, the PD printed a second submission from Foreman, essentially retracting the May 2 letter – on the grounds that, not only did he not write the letter he sent, but he doesn’t even agree with what he hadn’t written.

Here’s what Foreman said: “I didn’t draft the letter myself, and I’m ashamed and appalled that I failed to diligently read it before sending it. I didn’t consult with my fellow board members before I sent the letter. None of them endorsed the letter or were aware of its existence until it was published.”

It gets worse. Foreman goes on to specifically retract the board’s alleged consensus that Gorin is frustrating, disrespectful and dishonest, calling that portion of the letter “cruel, mean-spirited and blatantly untrue.” Rather, Foreman continues, “the list of Gorin’s accomplishments that have supported the district is too lengthy to include in this letter.”

We applaud Foreman for sending that mea culpa second letter, but stress that we’d far prefer candidate supporters simply write their own letters in the first place. (A call into Foreman about who provided the letter was not returned as of press time; Cuclis campaign manager Deborah Rogers said she was unaware of the origins of the letter.)

But let’s not kid ourselves. Such fudging on letters-to-the-editor realities are run of the mill in politics. Heck, a day after Foreman’s letter showed how a Sonoma ghost writer could pose as an entire water-district board, news broke that the presumed GOP presidential frontrunner had spent a decade posing as his own fawning publicist. All politics is local. Or, at least shares the same source material.

The worst part is that sketchy letters ultimately cloud the waters for genuine letters of candidate support from casual voters. Those opinions – the very opinions that honest political debate depends upon - can get lost in the muck if readers’ knee-jerk reaction is to assume all the letters are penned by people with less than two degrees of separation from a campaign.

Even more discouraging: There are now websites offering pre-written candidate endorsement letters for those so passionless they can’t even bother to put their own words together into actual sentences for a candidate. (“Beyond a doubt, Jane Doe is the most qualified person to run for a school board position in years,” begins one overly hyperbolic sample letter at writeexpress.com.)

The bottom line: If you’re genuinely impressed enough by a candidate to take 20 minutes and put down 200 words detailing why – send ahead. And good for you, by the way, for taking part in the democratic process.

If not, that’s fine too. But repress the urge to say OK to a friend who asks you to send in their letter using your name and address.

Tell the snollygosters to send their own.

Email jason.walsh@sonomanews.com.